Monday, September 25, 2006

Gay movies and culture

Over the weekend I saw a cute movie Touch of Pink. It's similar to The Wedding Banquet but with an Indian cultural touch instead of a Chinese one. What is interesting about these films and many "gay" films like The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert and To Wong Foo Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar is the cultural and familial issues that arise for gays, their families and the general public.

This leads me to wonder what our films will be like in that wonderful future where being gay isn't something that creates such incredible friction between the two groups (gay/straight). Thankfully my relationship with my parents around my gender preference has seldom been an issue and when it has it was generally more an issue for me then for them. It has also created a few very funny moments in our lives.

A few years ago, at the end of my marriage, I went to my parents house, frequently where I go when I need shoulders to cry on. When I arrived to cry about love lost I was informed that they were expecting some out of town guests at some point that afternoon. We pasted the time with me railing against an unjust and crazy world and my parents were as supportive as ever. The phone rang and their visitors were double checking directions and were just a few blocks away. Thankfully I had moved past the zenith of the cathartic experience I needed them for and quickly moved into supporting the Host by getting hor'dourves and drinks ready for the soon to arrive guests.

When they arrived I made the proper chit chat to make them feel welcome and buy my mother a bit more time in the kitchen. One of the guests must have noticed my wedding ring, I had yet to remove it because it had only been a few days and although I was emotionally done just hadn't taken the ring off. I was a little shocked and lost for words when asked about my wife. ACK! Incorrect assumption and a topic I was not about to go into the status of things. I don't recall exactly what I said but did nothing to correct their misunderstanding. This was also my queue to leave. I observed the proper social etiquette and departed for my home.

Over lunch, if only I had stayed, one of the guests ask my mother about her daughter-in-law. Clearly I had not provided enough information. : ) To which my mother replied "You must mean my son-in-law" revering to my sister and her husband. There was much confusion but finally all the facts were sorted out.

The next time I had a hard breakup and went again to the House of Unconditional Love and Support the first thing I said was "You better not be expecting any guests in the next couple of hours". It has become a wonderful little thing.

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