Wednesday, October 11, 2006

National Coming Out Day!

Today is National Coming Out Day.

For some deranged reason I'm one of those crazy people that had so much fun coming out to my parents I had to do it twice. Please note the sarcastic tone of the last sentence. Coming out to one's parents is not easy even if the parents are as cool as mine.

Many years ago during a parental visit, they were between posts and spending some time with their son, it was time for me to make my declaration and bring everyone up to speed with what was going on. Although my heart was racing a million miles an hour it went well and my parents expressed their love and acceptance. Within a few days they were on their way to their next post overseas and although we always stayed in touch there wasn't any need to really discuss the "issue" and we all went on with our lives and somehow over time I simply forgot about the conversation. Don't ask me how I forgot, part of it I'm sure was that it just wasn't a BIG issue for my parents so they didn't need to bring it up and although it had gone well I didn't want to remember having to let my parents know that I was different, the family name wouldn't be passed on by me, that my life was going to have challenges and who knows what else.

Flash forward a couple of years when my mother and sister were in the area looking at colleges my sister might attend. We were coming back from Eastern Washington and my sister was asleep in the back seat of the car. It was time to let my mom know her son was gay. With sweaty palms and my heart yet again racing I let her know.

"Yes, we know. You already told us" was her response.

Complete shock and a flood of memories of the first time came to me in a flash. How could I have spent the last two or three days FREAKING out that I had to tell her, waiting for the right moment and worst of all wondering if everything would be OK.

Now, many years later, we can all laugh about it. Laughing about life is one of the greatest treasures I gained from my family, it seems to be a trait of ours and has served me well over the years.

If there are gays in your life that are out please thank them. Thank them for being true to themselves and being open about who they are. Our society will never truly accept homosexuals until we are all out of the closet living our lives openly. Those people that fear us must learn we are just like everyone else and that gender preference is no reason for fear and hatred. Being gay in our society is still a gigantic challenge and although over the last couple of decades we have made great strides in social and legal acceptance, gays are not yet equal members of society, gays are attacked, our relationships are not legally recognized and in some countries people are killed solely because of their sexual orientation. I have been blessed with friends and family that have embraced me 100% not all of us gays are so lucky.

My heartfelt thanks to my friends and family.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Coming out and then forgetting about it is quite a feat, Mr. Davey. Had you already been diagnosed at that point?

Anonymous said...

Gods, this is so lame! Please post something new! Write about Vegas, write about a bladder infection, write about the Pink Purge of Gay republican staffers... anything!!!